People do not die for us immediately, but remain bathed in a sort of aura of life which bears no relation to true immortality but through which they continue to occupy our thoughts in the same way as when they were alive. It is as though they were traveling abroad.
~Marcel Proust
They say we exist as a part and one day we shall disappear into that which produced us. This is the most robust will of nature among many others.
As far as I know, after the soul departs, funerals occur in all communities. Moslims bury, Hindus burn while Parsis feed their mortals to vultures… The procedure varies according to the scripture they hold sacred, but the basic motive remains more or less constant and so does the feeling in the hearts of those whose loved one has departed… At this not so tender age of 22 years, I feel I m fortunate enough of not having to attend many funerals (touchwood!). It’s not that I have not seen people dying, but having to go on their funerals is an entirely different alley for me.
The other day, I attended a funeral of a classmate of mine who met an unfortunate and untimely death in a Road traffic Accident. There I was, on the way to the Shamshan Bhumi where he was to be cremated, drooling over stuff like Meaning of Life, Death and Nature’s Will. The deceased classmate of mine never swore on anyone, nor did he have the so called vices prescribed by the society (Alcoholism, Smoking or indulgence in any damn unlawful activity). I never heard sum one saying something which is even profane or awful about him. To sum up, he was a straight laced guy who lived a descent life. Then why did nature choose him? What the hell is the nature’s criterion for Death?? Is it Immorality? I don’t think so; otherwise some of the people whom I know should have died long ago. In the past 2 days, all of them whom I have actually asked this question have all said the same thing – ‘Apna Apna Naseeb hai Yaar!’ But nobody has been able to explain me the reason behind this. Nature is so bloody unfair sometimes. As I have already written above, the notion that your Karma decides the course of your life seems perfectly false here. If this was to happen, my deceased friend was to live for many more years. But that didn’t happen! Perhaps I will have to ravel more on this until I finally arrive at an answer. And I am very sure that I wasn’t the only person who thought that way that day.
It was raining hard that day and I found myself a shed beside the funeral Pyre. I looked at the Body of my deceased friend, lying there half beneath the wooden logs totally donned with a white, the white cloth they put it on in the Mortuary. Barely 5 hours ago, he was alive and happy. Then came a moment which pulled his soul out and what remained was a lifeless bloody Mutilated body. And 5 hours after that, there he was, lying in the Pyre. Earlier I saw a completely shattered father giving fire to his 22yr old son. I saw him revolving around the Pyre with the help of a friend of his(He had very recently had an attack of mild Paralysis) with an earthen pot on his shoulders and finally dropping it down. I saw a wailing mother and beating her chest who’s just not ready to accept her child’s death. I saw her getting angry over the body of my deceased friend for not talking to him. I saw a sister who just would not cry. She just would not say anything. Believe me, this was the most soul-wrenching day of my life!
Now hers another incident, about 6-7 years back, I attended a funeral of a member of my extended family in my hometown. There in Chandrapur, as per the tradition, a man walks at the end of the funeral procession and keeps throwing 1 rupee coins behind in the air. I must be 12 or 13 then. I remember the elated faces of a couple of men when they saw the procession and literally ran for collecting Money. To this day, approximately 10 years after, I still can’t forget the greedy and vicious faces of those 2 people who were actually sniggering while following the procession and collecting money. There was a different obnoxious look on their face. Perhaps they thought what they were doing was cool. I was just into my adolescence and I couldn’t believe sum one could be like this! It was only after they were reprimanded by sumone that they actually stopped their shameless act! It was my first encounter with the heinous nature of Man!
Ek aur episode hai, the procession had reached the cremation ground and the body was laid on the wooden logs. They were waiting for the Pujari to come and initiate the proceedings. The woman who had Passed away was a widow and nor did she have any children. I was in standard 8 then I suppose. While the Pujari was still to arrive, a man started joking and 2-3 people started laughing aloud, just 4-5 feet from the body and on the platform itself. The protagonist there was continuously cracking absurd jokes and people laughing on them grew with each one. Then a person came on the platform and went to the perpeteror (Yes I would call him that!) and said — ‘Ha Ha.. Aaj Kal toh Maiyat ka poora concept hi badal gaya hai!’ Saying this, he laughed even more loudly. The incident remains fresh in my mind till date and disturbs me greatly still. Ye saali Duniya, Coooool lagne ke liye kuch bhi karegi!
You die. You leave this world. You are cremated. Believe me, it’s only your close ones to whom your existence and your Death actually matters. Rest all are only there because they fear nobody would come on their funeral if they won’t attend other’s Funeral. In a way, all their life, they work to ensure maximum attendance on their funeral! Strange!
But still. One should attend funerals I feel, even if the person who died didn’t mean much to you. One, the family gets support and second, they give us an opportunity to look inside our own self. To face the most harsh reality of life. To feel other’s pain. They teach us the value of the most important solitary unit of our life- Family. Family, as they put it, is the only country of Heart. They teach us to respect our family, Love them and be duty bound to them as long as life exists. Who knows whose gonna see the light of tomorrow and whose not. Some Funerals, like this one I attended yesterday, also embark upon the stealthiest property of Nature– Uncertainty! You live only today. Present, is the only Present life has offered us. It depends entirely on us to relish it or waste it. There’s never any tomorrow. Funerals teach you to be humble. They teach us to take everything that comes our way with dignity and a sense of acceptance. Afterall entire world was there, is there and will be there in the same way even after you. So never attach too much importance to your own self.
Let me end this up with the following quote-
The most entrancing thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science. And what in this world can be more mysterious than Death!
– Albert Einstein
apratimdixitsays 